What would life look like if we went through it collecting securities rather than insecurities? What would it feel like if we built our self-worth from the inside out rather than the outside in?

The concept of self-worth is based on our view of the self, yet most of us go through life half asleep to our true being and power, focusing instead on how others define our worth. It’s time to wake up, take ownership of our intrinsic value, and define our own sense of self.

I’ve been a fan of Jennifer Aniston since the first time I saw an episode of the TV show Friends. She was likable, friendly, and a little kooky. She was beautiful, but not too beautiful. She was relatable.

In an interview, Aniston reflected on a painful childhood experience she carried into adulthood. “I remember a parental figure saying to me around the rather critical age of 11, after a dinner party, that I was excused from the table because I didn’t have anything interesting to add to the conversation.” She went on to say, “Ouch. It stuck to me, it stuck to me like painfully worded sentences and, if I’m being honest — and I’m being honest because I’m 50 and that comes with the territory — I carried that sentence with me into adulthood.”

Aniston said being on Friends was the first time she started seeing herself in a new light.

It made me think about the similarities in my life. I’m in a show like Friends, too. It’s a blossoming local community called Ageless in Seattle, a community designed to empower, celebrate, and support women. But those negative comments made me think about all the mean things people say to us that seem to stick like glue. We tend to let go of the kind comments, laugh them off in our female, self-deprecating way, while we hold onto the negative ones like badges of honor.

What a beautiful world it would be if we went around collecting securities instead of insecurities. It made me think of all the decades we spend collecting those insecurities, allowing them to damage our self-worth. 

What would life be like if we didn’t have to spend decades peeling the layers we’ve built around us — if we didn’t spend so much time building those darn layers in the first place?

How many of us are walking around with baggage projected onto us by others, damaging our self-worth, and holding us back?

Why not shout to the rooftops, “I Am Worthy!” Isn’t it time we shifted our focus from the negative to the positive? What makes you special? What makes you the you that no one else can be?

It takes moxie to let go of our baggage.
It takes moxie to tell ourselves a new story.
It takes moxie to see ourselves in a new light.
It takes moxie to stand in that light and shine.

Midlife is filled with moxie moments — moments in life when we choose differently: new thoughts, new friends, new experiences, new stories, new beliefs, and a new mindset about ourselves and our capabilities.

The truth is, we can see ourselves in a new light at any moment. It’s a choice. A choice to begin life anew, a life of “I Ams” rather than “I Am Nots.”

When you are your own champion, you’ll experience one of the most wonderful securities in the world: knowing that someone will always be there for you.

When you begin saying “I Am,” that someone will be you.