Love & Wisdom
Finding Her Way Back
Washington native Mary Lambert channels heartbreak, healing, and hope in her first major single in nearly a decade
It’s taken more than three years, 42 revisions, and nearly 60 mixes for Mary Lambert to finish and release her powerful new single, “The Tempest.” “I just became such a perfectionist,” the Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter and Washington state native tells Seattle magazine from her current home in western Massachusetts. “(‘The Tempest’) feels like one of my…
The Art of Saying ‘I’m Sorry’
How to master the subtle nuances of a heartfelt apology
I wrote a letter of apology to my wife the last time i got drunk. I did this at the suggestion of a substance-abuse counselor I’d gone to see in Bellevue. He even provided me with a handout on how to structure an apology. Mine wound up totaling 546 words and consuming most of a…
Heartbeat: The Ongoing Struggle for Women’s Rights
Why resilience, advocacy, and empowerment are more important now than ever
I am old enough to have experienced several “firsts.” I was admitted to Yale graduate school before it admitted undergraduate women. I was one of the first two women hired by the University of Washington’s Department of Sociology that were eligible for “ladder positions” (the possibility of tenure). I was one of the first three…
Can We Be Friends? Yes We Can.
Evergreen turns to THRED to help students with disabilities form bonds
When Aaron Chasan isn’t running around Seattle wearing a bear suit giving out hugs to help quell the Seattle Freeze, he’s busy running THRED, a company that helps people develop meaningful relationships based on shared interests. Among his favorite and most important clients is the Evergreen Transition Program, a public school that provides services to…
A Seattle Mother’s Day Gift Guide
Shop local and make her day even sweeter
I go through a lot of phases as a mom. When my kids were babies, all I wanted on Mother’s Day was to be alone, and my husband was left with any baggage the request created. These days, I’m looking for a chill family day — maybe a hike with some sandwiches I don’t have…
A Disco-Inspired Love Story
A Bellevue wedding, 27 years in the making
A chance meeting. A long love story. One unforgettable night. Randy Gantenbein, who once managed Paul Allen’s properties and has spent decades in hospitality, and Ernie Vigil, a Navy veteran and longtime nurse, first met in a San Diego Starbucks on Easter Sunday. Randy was sipping coffee and flipping through his horoscope. “It said, ‘You’ll…
Why Text Therapy Works for Teens
Seattle’s free therapy program meets teens where they are — on their phones
When teens in Seattle need someone to talk to, many are starting with their phones. The city launched a free virtual therapy program for teens and young adults in December. It’s open to residents ages 13 to 24 and includes unlimited messaging with a licensed therapist, one live video session per month, and access to…
Heartbeat: I Have My Escape. What’s Yours?
My post-election trauma has me seeking solace in anything but the news
I am in a cycle that certain people are going through after the presidential election. It’s a classic case of grief, refusal, some level of acceptance, and hopefully renewal. I don’t know if just avoidance and escape are part of the model, but they certainly are for me. My reaction? The morning news was part…
Grudge Detox: Purging Toxic Thoughts
Refocusing on the future rather than holding onto the past
I spent 20 years waiting for some sort of an apology from my stepfather. I was not entirely patient about this. For most of that time I was pretty furious, actually. And while I certainly wouldn’t characterize this as good or healthy, I don’t think it was entirely unjustified, either. My mom discovered he had…
Avoid These Common Conversation Crimes
When to talk, when to not, and what not to say to your partner
Because of my work with couples and relationships both as a researcher and an on-air relationship expert, I have observed many intimate conversations ranging from sweet and loving to harsh, nasty, and even vindictive. I have noticed when the best course would be just to listen, and when it’s time to respond. I am also…
Crossing Generational Streams
Teens create art, receive insightful life advice
Kids look toward the future. Older people often relive the past. Those two worlds collided in the best of ways recently when the Woodinville Teen Arts Alliance collaborated with residents from Fairwinds Brittany Park Retirement Home to create beautiful art inspired by residents’ lives. “Our conversations made me appreciate the value of human connection and…
The DEI Backlash: Staying the Course
DEI and merit are not contradictory
The backlash against diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) initiatives has gained momentum in recent months, fueled by political and cultural divisiveness. Some critics have linked DEI policies to high-profile incidents, such as the mid-air collision between an American Airlines passenger plane and a military helicopter near Washington, D.C., Jan. 29. However, there is no credible…
When Your Mind Makes a Promise That Your Body Can’t Fill
Aging is inevitable. We must accept it with grace and gratitude.
Denial is not always a bad thing. I practice it religiously, albeit selectively. I know my age is getting close to the beginning of my eighth decade, but I choose to see that as just the start of another one. I am also into denial about what my true hair color might be if I…
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