Worst of 2011

The lowlights of 2011 in Seattle, including sex, drugs, dogs and salmon.

By Seattle Magazine Staff December 2, 2011

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This article originally appeared in the December 2011 issue of Seattle magazine.

ASININE

Yo-ho-ho and a BUI: Seafair boasts 71 people arrested for boating under the influence—an increase from last year’s 62 drunken sailors but down from 2008’s impressive 84.

Bad dog! Local pop singer Lisa Dank falls in love with found pooch, refuses to return to rightful owner.

Take it to go! Marie Callendar’s in Northgate suddenly shuts down, tosses diners out midmeal.

Trash talk: City’s maintenance union accuses CleanScapes of stealing jobs, after the company offers to clean up Westlake Park for free.

AMUSING


I scan dead people: New “Living Headstones” offer more info on cemetery occupants via QR codes for smartphones.

Make mine a 5: Seattle’s Best Coffee launches a new coffee “level” numbering system for the simpler sippers among us.

We were rooting for Wiggles: U District comedy club Giggles, after a brief stint as strip club Jiggles, reverts to comedy club Giggles.

Flame mail: Olympic Peninsula mailman is cited for “extreme laziness” after burning thousands of undelivered letters.

 

ANNOYING

Cold comfort: Last spring’s abysmally gloomy weather means an extraordinary year for moss.

Cloudy with a chance of lost files: In March, Amazon launches its massive cloud-based storage system, which crashes in April.

Can’t buy me love: Paul Allen goes Gates bashing in his memoir.

Stormy weather: KUOW “fires” volunteer weather commentator Cliff Mass over his refusal to stay on topic.

Gross: Ballard’s city-installed rain gardens turn into cesspools.

Failure to launch: After beginning construction on a $12 million facility to house a space shuttle, the Museum of Flight loses its bid.

APPALLING

Something fishy: Samples from Tacoma-area restaurants reveal 38 percent of menu-promised “wild-caught Pacific salmon” is actually farm-raised Atlantic salmon.

Can’t touch this: After a dog is electrocuted by “contact voltage” from a metal plate, Seattle City Light discovers 56 more streetlights emitting stray voltage.

Ad nauseam: Seattle Weekly owner Village Voice Media calls problem of child sex trafficking ads “overblown” in dispute with Mayor Mike McGinn over classified ads.

The sky is falling! No, wait, it’s just glass panels plummeting from the upper floors of the Four Seasons Hotel. Phew.

 

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